Sunday, August 16, 2009


How do we cope with uncertainty? It seems we will be moving at the end of the year to another town (and I'm not sure which town), to another school, another job, another home, another many anothers and quite frankly I feel sick in the pit of my stomach. None of us want to move, but when my husband's contract finishes at the end of the year we will have no other choice - other than my husband 'resigning' and having no job! Doesn't seem much of a choice to me.

While I wait to see God's plan for us - I choose to trust Him. It's not easy. I have to keep laying it down hour after hour, day after day, week after week. AND I play that powerful song from 'Fireproof' (the movie) - 'While I'm waiting' by John Waller: While I'm waiting I will serve you. While I'm waiting I will worship you. I sing along with him at the top of my voice promising to wait though it may be painful, to be patient, to be bold and confident, to run the race, to hope, to take every step in obedience... While I'm waiting I will not fail. I am peaceful. It's not easy but I will faithfully wait. Worship. Serve. While I'm waiting.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

I challenge you to a dare: The love dare.

Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, being indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance - the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes - but your inner disposition.
Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. ( from 1 Peter 3 - The Message, a paraphrase of the bible)

Have you seen the hit movie Fireproof ( If you haven't, rush out and buy it. It is a wonderful marriage enrichment tool, whether you are going through tough times of not. If you aren't married, but hope to be one day, it is a lesson in how to make a marriage work.

The plot is about a young couple who are facing divorce, but then the husband's father challenges him to the Love Dare - 40 days of demonstrating unconditional love. This he does without his wife's knowlege and often with very little reward. Once the husband finds the Lord, his motivation for doing the dare changes. He starts to practise these biblical principals with no agenda other than love and his marriage is restored, and his wife too comes to know the Lord.

The Love Dare in the movie is presented as a book of handwritten dares from the husband's father. Now it has become a movement and the book by that title 'The Love Dare' by Stephen Kendrick & Alex Kendrick, a spin off from the movie, leads husbands and wives through the 40 days of the love dare journey.

Well now I am secretly (to my husband) taking the dare - demonstrating my love for my husband of 21 years and learning a better way to be a wife. At the moment I am on Day 6 - so it is early days yet, but so far I have seen my husband looking less stressed, and definately loved! Last night, sitting comfortably in front of the fire he told me that I am very thoughtful, that I don't complain about things amongst other things. I wonder if he would have said that before the dare. I am learning to put him first, to find ways to show him I care a great deal for him and I am watching my reactions and words. I know that at times I have spoken words hastily. Now I try not to say anything negative. I'm finding that most things that upset me quickly really don't matter tomorrow, and so I don't address them. I keep quiet. The best side to this is that I have noticed that the little things that I do that niggle at my husband (for instance - he is a neat freak, I am a clutter bug) have become unimportant to him, and he has said so, because in the scheme of things I am doing what he wants the most - and that is loving him unconditionally.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Be still

Be still and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10)

This is my new motto. When people ask me how I'm going and put BUSY? on the end of the sentence it makes me cringe. I tell them I am no longer impressed by busyness and then I tell them I am trying a new thing, that my new motto is to 'Be Still'.

The next question is usually - 'So Asta, how's that working for you?' Oh they of little faith. Yes I am a busy person. BUT I have been busier, and I am genuinely trying to find time to go into what I call 'the clearing' with God daily.

The other thing I am doing is making sure that the commitments I make line up with what I believe God has put me on this planet for. I'm trying to follow God's advice - it's so simple - make your yes a yes and your no a no. Try it. It is so empowering.

And just to prove I do what I preach - today is my second Monday off work. I have dropped Mondays in order to write (oh and to dance around the house with no audience!!!).

Monday, July 20, 2009

cellophane women

Today I bought the domain name ''. I'm excited.

I have a dream, prompted by a chance viewing of a documentary. I saw footage of a woman, recently widowed, soon to be thrown out onto the streets. Her crime? Her husband was dead and in India when your husband dies you become ZERO - a nobody with no name. In life she was considered half his life. In death she became a corpse.

Her tears were a steady stream with no end from deep within her broken soul. She haunted me for weeks. Then, one day while I was on holiday, I could no longer keep silent, and a story poured out of me - the story of the Cellophane Woman.

'Cellophane Woman' will be published as a picture book of hope for women of all ages. And will become a place of hope. There will be articles about widows from all around the world, and book and movie reviews and links to sites where widows can be sponsored.

Will you walk this journey with me? The book, the website? Will you dream with me for a better future for our sisters who are widowed?